Oh fuck it makes a lot more sense now, why Akira shielding Takizawa had such an impact on him, and why Takizawa was so frenzied with fighting Amon.
He was already doubting that no one cared about him anymore and his guilt was multiplied tenfold by the fact he could tell Houji let him win… Houji letting him kill him said, “I can’t let that you go even after trying to prove yourself to me became you’re a monster but I care about you too much to kill you so you’ll have to kill me.” That was a great sacrifice… but. Takizawa being forced to kill someone that loved him kinda reiterated his fear that he was a monster by forcing him to kill a loved one an act that is in itself monsterous and escalated his self-hate by about a thousand.
So when someone literally set aside not just their possible life but also their honor and actually said what they felt that second time it completely shattered the shaky idea he had that his existence was worthless.
It might also explain the fact of why he couldn’t immediately accept Amon’s offer at redemption, for one thing, he didn’t feel worthy of it, for another Amon was a little like Houji in that… he still wasn’t really accepting what Takizawa had become even when he was wanting to save him… (He could only see that as a reason to live later and it’s still unclear if he’s really accepted it.)
It took the dose of unconditional, “I’m really angry with you to the point I told you to die because I hate feeling what I do and I have unsorted issues with ghouls atm but ultimately I don’t care what you’ve become I’d still give up my honor and my life to save you without an expecation of recipication because I care about you.” that really got through to him… Even if part of it was guilt for not being able to save him before… Maybe even because it acknowledged part of what happened wasn’t his fault…
I’m partial to SeiAki, I’ve always loved the “arguing like an old married couple” trope. I love how Seidou’s envy of her is mixed in with his attraction and, as 115 suggested, romantic feelings for her. The way they’re constantly torn between fighting alongside each other and fighting against each other is really something to watch; which reached its ultimate culmination on Rushima, where he almost killed her only to later choose to risk his life to save her. And Akira’s hidden care for him is also very moving when she lets it show.
But I find it works just as well as an unrequited love – or rather, an unrequited romantic interest, because Akira said herself that she loves both Takizawa and Amon. This is a very angsty ship so the unrequited suits it well. I just hope to see them fight unreservedly on the same side in the future, not fighting amongst themselves or directly against each other. But all that said, I still approve of Akiramon, especially because of all the Touken parallels.
@dreamofcentipedes I hope you don’t mind, but OMG I absolutely agree with you and I just wanted to add, because I see too many people “forgetting” about this ever since ch121, that Akira never indeed to this day made any difference between her feelings for Amon and Takizawa, so it’s not like either ship currently prevails over one another.
Akira may have left with Amon in ch121, but Takizawa had already left first in ch118 and, again, Akira’s feelings never did anything but put the guys on the same level:
Of course, she apparently kissed Amon in ch121 and so she might indeed end up with him, but both Akira and Amon are currently stuck in their character development, which is something that only Seidou can help them with and which means the Seiakiramon dynamic isn’t set in stone at all.
As for Seidou, as you explained in your other post, he needs to confront them again because he’s totally running away from them out of a wrong assumption of still “not deserving to be by their side”, which is yet another argument as to why the whole dynamic is in for more significant developments.
I wouldn’t say that polyamory is more likely as an ending for this dynamic when ch121 did seem to give an advantage (so to speak) to Akiramon, but my point is that Akira’s character has always been Defined by keeping a lot bottled up inside (see Gori’s words in ch143 before she finally starts crying), which means that she’s bound to address her feelings for the two men again (either to finally discriminate between them or to end with both).
Again, I hope you don’t mind my two cents :3 Great post!
…was not ok, M has a serious problem with violence, yes, but it was
also symbolic that people meant to protect him (akira his superior, or
his mother) protecting his agressors instead (takizawa and his father) i
did find karmatic M attacking T bc it was T’s ambush that put M in
torso’s reach, that whole figth was levels of gray with A later
attacking M and the Qs, the fact that S just killed a whole squad is
never even touch after, yet it seams that Ak & A where given the
moral high ground…
… where given the moral high ground after that, after all M is the
monster, M attacked S and Ak, but so did S and houji, M is the one that
goes into a dark path after while Ak, A & S get to peace out the
story & come back as heros later, im not saying that attacking Ak
was good, it was wrong, but everyone there was wrong, and we see M admit
that he killed and that makes him a murderer, and it burdens him, yet
Ak is proud at how many ghouls she killed and using feguchi and that
just bothers me
I don’t hate you, don’t worry! And while I really
love Akira and Amon both as characters, I have similar frustrations with
them. (Amon especially because his arc is pretty pathetic in :re
whereas it was fantastic in TG.)
I mean, I think the moral
high ground examples you’re citing are more problems with the fandom
always wanting to demonize Mutsuki than with how the story presents
them. It wasn’t shocking to me that Mutsuki crushed Takizawa’s balls or
stabbed Akira. It was wrong, yes, but it also wasn’t technically illegal
according to the laws of the CCG (the laws are wrong though).
But
I would say that I disagree about how Akira and Amon are characterized afterwards.
Akira made the morally right (according to the story) decision when she
broke with the CCG to save Takizawa.
Of course that action is perceived
as good by the story. But since then, Akira and Amon have not been
heroes–they’ve needed rescuing from Takizawa, who saved both of them,
because he is the hero in their story, as he always wanted to be. He just hasn’t realized it yet. My guess is he’s going to have to save their asses from Donato pretty soon.
Also
Akira has not expressed pride in her actions since 120, though we have seen her express that her father wouldn’t be happy with her. She expressed a very conflicted
worldview at that point, because it was undeniable to her that ghouls
were not monsters after Hinami and the Aogiri kids, but to admit that
you’re a murderer–just like we’ve seen with Kaneki–is not easy to do.
Plus, if this happens as Akira says, her father’s legacy is tarnished
forever… which is what Touka told her to do, but Touka also needs to do this with Kaneki who is a parallel for Arata (admit that what he did was wrong).
It’s no coincidence this was said in a conversation between Touka and Akira because this is a way they still need to grow, both of them.
Yes, I am bothered that they just get to waltz
back into the story after abandoning Goat, because the right thing to do
is not to run away, it’s to create a better world and if you don’t know
what that looks like (see Akira and Amon’s emptiness talk in 121) you
figure it out.
But then again, what they did is not much worse than what
Touka and Kaneki did, because they also made no effort to find out what
that might look like as recent chapters have bluntly stated to us.
Akira thought Kaneki killed Arima too because he lied to her about that,
so she probably had a hard time coming to terms with that (and yet Hinami was forced to hug it out with her, so ughhhhh there’s definitely hypocrisy there). I’m not saying it’s right.
I’m saying it’s understandable.
Along those lines, Akira
and Amon foil Kaneki in that aspect: always seeing themselves as better
than, because that’s how they cope with what they’ve done. It’s a coping
mechanism as much as Kaneki’s brokenness is a coping mechanism. It’s
their way of feeling as if they deserve to live, because to live they
need a purpose, and their purpose for Akira was taught to be being liker
her father, and for Amon atoning for what he helped Donato do. Except
Akira does not want to be like her father, not deep down, and Amon
cannot atone for that because a) he was a kid and shouldn’t be faulted
for it, and b) you can’t bring back the dead.
Now as a
ghoul, Amon can’t see himself as morally superior, though he tries.
Hence why he can’t actually accomplish anything–not saving Takizawa,
not saving Kurona. He refuses to acknowledge that he’s been made into a
representation of what he’s always been: a murderer, and just like
Donato (and Mado) a child murderer. He’s not better than Takizawa. (This is why I think Hajime is very
important to Amon’s arc.) Until he accepts this, he’s stagnating. At least
currently he and Akira are trying to help ghouls, but like, they can’t
really help them from a moral high ground that is built on sand because
they don’t actually have a moral high ground.
Since Kaneki’s recently made progress, I really think Amon and Akira are next on the docket to get that revelation. I also believe Akira will have to give Fueguchi back to Hinami and apologize. At least. She better. And Amon better apologize as well.
Akira and Amon have not been heroes–they’ve needed rescuing from Takizawa, who saved both of them, because he is the hero in their story, as he always wanted to be. He just hasn’t realized it yet. My guess is he’s going to have to save their asses from Donato pretty soon.
Btw guys, it’s not because I say I find Seiaki to have a slightly more fulfilling development in :Re so far that you can send me ship-biased asks about wanting Amon to die so that the ship can be canon.
Seriously, grow up.
Me liking a ship, canon or not, will never be about erasing “competition” for that ship, especially when I’m a huge supporter of Seiakiramon in the first place.
This poem from around this time last year finally seems to be taking on a new meaning. I wrote a meta on it at the time, but the sole fig leaf, an ark, dissolving into a pillar of salt, those are all biblical references. Specifically to Adam and Eve, Noah, and then to Lot.
Those references seemed strictly old testament, but now a poem about final judgement gains new meaning in light of current events and comparison to the biblical account of revelations. The prophecy for an end time scenarios as held by the new testament of the Christian bible.
Loved your post :3 but I just wanted to add, about Takizawa’s possible involvement:
he has the cross
he is one of the Jokers
he’s a Knight in chess symbolism
and, mostly, he parallels Kaneki a great deal,or at least he used to, until recently
About the parallels between Kaneki and Seidou, there are many obvious ones (both became OEGs because of Kanou, both used to be CCG investigators, both were tried to become the OEK figure…), but I want to focus on the ones Ishida introduced after Seidou started his own redemption path, because I find they are the most relevant to Kaneki’s current situation as Dragon:
“if we don’t tie [them] down with a chain, [they]’ll go off and die”
resolve through love
redemption
As I said though, they do parallel each other quite strongly for point 1 but are currently opposed on point 2. Point 3 is one Kaneki has yet to reach, but considering the stance you take in your meta, or even my personal interpretation of Kaneki’s narrative, I’d say it should eventually be Kaneki’s next step.
both don’t care about the rebellion because their personal motives for being a part of it are more selfish than selfless
and both have “a chain to tie them down otherwise they would go off and die”:
for Seidou, this chain is Amon and Akira, but they’re symbolically represented by Amon’s cross
for Kaneki, this chain is Touka and she’s symbolically represented by the ring she gave him.
The second parallel is one on which they don’t match at all, compared to the first, which is what makes Seidou’s possible involvement against Dragoneki so interesting in my opinion:
but their way to act regarding their respective love interest aren’t alike at all.
This is Seidou:
And this is Kaneki:
Obviously I’m not saying that one point of view is better than the other, although Seidou is in obvious need to confront Amon and Akira one more time considering that he still doesn’t see himself as worthy of them, but at the same time, look, that’s Seidou
…managing to keep his Kakuja under control while thinking about making Akira (and Amon) happy, even if that means he doesn’t get to be a part of it vs Kaneki in the current arc:
Again, I’m not saying that one’s way is better than the other’s (not the same personal history, not the same circumstances), they both have their flaws in regards to how they’re dealing with their personal wishes about their loved one, but the differences (considering how similar they are on many things besides that point) struck me, when they both were able to find their resolve through love.
Takizawa managed to control his kakuja (and to fully start his redemption path) while he decided to only live for Akira’s (and also Amon’s) sake, even if it meant never being able to see himself as her equal. Whereas Kaneki went berserk at the idea that failing meant never living on with Touka and their baby and he became a Dragon threatening Tokyo.
So, back to your meta and Kaneki’s current situation, Seidou is the perfect example of the realistic character who learnt from what he went through, while Kaneki is the perfect example of the character who has trouble learning anything at all, as Furuta noticed ages ago…
And so, while Seidou now is on a redemption arc because he acknowledged his past crimes, Kaneki became the berserk OEG that’s threatening an entire city because Furuta saw through him from the beginning and used him.
Like a mirroring effect though, Kaneki found the love and hope for a future that he always seeked in Touka, while Takizawa thinks he doesn’t deserve the recognition he always wanted from the people he cares the most about.
And finally, both don’t care about the rebellion, but Kaneki losing control is putting at stake everything he fought for so far, including Touka and his future with her, while Seidou might decide that he will not want to stay out of the current conflict (the knight piece/joker card), because losing this world will directly impact the people he decided to live for.
Does it make sense? I don’t know, but Kaneki and Seidou have been showing a lot of parallels, starting with being the only two successes of Kanou until he learnt of the Qs surgery technique, so I don’t see why it wouldn’t apply now again.
In the end, their differences mostly show in their respective stances towards the people they love: for both it’s a way to find their resolve, but their approach is fundamentally different, which is maybe why in the end…
Kaneki went from the respected OEK to a rampaging Kakuja that might need both humans and ghouls in order to defeat him and that, until then, might hurt people he cares about a lot
while Seidou, who once made it clear that he didn’t care about much because all he could do was “to live for someone else”, might take on a more direct approach to saving this world, if that can be useful to the people he loves.
So sorry for rambling… As I said, I love the subject too much ;_;
Remember, this is what Akira was doing when she got injured.
Yet the moment she wakes up she doesn’t even think to ask if he’s okay, if her sacrifice was at all successful?
This was Akira’s moment of growth, not whatever she said in front of Amon.
“I’m trying to repress my emotions for the sake of others, but I can’t.”
Akira’s not empty, she’s literally full to bursting with all kinds of emotions but she can’t deal with them. For her it’s better to be controlled by anger, or even empty.
The thing also is about Akira is that she will suppress them until they literally explode. We saw them explode and Seidou this time was the trigger, as both he and Amon were last time, and the time before that. After waking up, now that Seidou was removed from her Akira went right back to suppression.
To be blunt because it’s late, this happens with a lot of characters in Tokyo Ghoul. They don’t realize the importance of another unless that person is literally five feet in front of them, and the second they wander away they forget again. That’s basically Kaneki too, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.
On a more complex note though, Seidou is basically a walking representation of all the problems that Akira has been made aware of but does not want to confront. The fact that all of her loved ones are ghouls, that she’s had an active role in hunting them, and that she’s spent a majority of her life trying to live up to the expectations of others doing something she in her heart didn’t really want to do.
It’s a purposeful irony that Akira does basically everything for the people she loves, including hunt ghouls, only to see all the people she loves turn into ghouls in front of her. It means he task is sisyphian, it’s never going to be accomplished because it was never supposed to be accomplished in the first place.
Not only does Seidou represent this unpleasant reality though, he actively confronts her. He is not a ghoul who would do everything for her sake just like Amon and Kaneki, perhaps when she is unconscious and not physically around him Seidou can pretend to act that way, but Seidou is a needy person. He wants validation, no demands it from her. Rather than a ghoul who would promise to seek the answers for her like Amon, Seidou would demand them from her.
When the trio finally reunited, Amon’s only mean of communication to Akira was to save her, after which he completely ignored her. It was Seidou who kept getting her involved in the conversation and wanted answers from her.
This is of course not to say anything about whether or not I think Amon or Seidou is healthier in their relationship to Akira, as both are varying degrees of unhealthy and it’s a pointless comparison. Rather is an elaboration on the reasoning why Akira would deliberately avoid Seidou right now.
He is in a way the ugliness of the ghoul world. The kind of enemy that Furuta motivates the public to hunt down. He’s not a group of children hugging Akira, or a selfless girl willing to hide her pain, or a coffee manager trying to relate the tragedy of their fathers. He’s a murderer who admits that, but also decided to keep living on anyway. It’s no wonder that Seidou is the one to discuss with Hakatori the problem of the Oggai, he’s come to represent them as a whole, obligate people eaters who even while knowing it’s wrong continue to still thrie and exist and the tragedies that lie within their lives.
Hey Anon! And me too, I really wanted to hug both of them and I wish she could have hugged Kaneki instead of punching him but you’re right, at least he smiled while crying and for once it felt more genuine than the few smiles we’ve seen ever since Arima’s death.
As for Akira and Amon, well, between…
and
and
AND
Yes, I think they might not be seen for a while. Akira needs to find a new way of life by actually watching what the world really is about through newly opened eyes and nothing really tied Amon down to :Re either.
Obviously we’ll see them again, and I’m even hoping they’ll find Takizawa in the meantime, but Akira taking her own position towards the CCG and the rest of the ghoul world is something I always wanted her to do, so I’m sad to see them go but at the same I’m happy that they’re able to continue developing, even if outside of the readers’ eyes.
I’m missing them already ❤
Have a nice weekend Anon! 😀
Hey Anon 🙂 Thank you so much for reading and for the very nice words! ❤
About Seiaki, nope, I still don’t think we can say that it’s drowning because:
Takizawa’s feelings were made rather clear with ch115 and ch118, namely Akira and Amon are both very important to him, but being on a redemption part he believes he doesn’t have his place next to them, which is why he left in the first place
however his departure screams that we will see him again and that his personal character arc will have to get an ending, like him confronting Akira and Amon at least one more time for closure
As for Akira, well, she said it herself…
She still hasn’t made a clear distinction in her feelings for the two of them, so as far as I’m concerned I like both Akiramon and Seiaki, but Akira hasn’t said anything about being in love with Amon and it’s not because she kissed Amon that they’re now in an exclusive romantic relationship. At least not for me.
That kiss was definitely the start of something (and I loved this part) but the way I see it, it’s the start of their new partnership: they’re leaving to find their place in this unfair world, and as I was saying above, they might even meet Takizawa again. So we will see Takizawa again for sure, if just because he needs to confront Akira and Amon in order to end his personal character arc. That’s what being on a redemption arc means.
Of course that doesn’t mean any promise of actual polyamory, but as long as Akira doesn’t clearly state what her feelings are for the two men (or just one of the two), that means there is still this need for Akira to confront Takizawa now that she could really talk with Amon.
Honestly, I’ve always been more of a Seiakiramon fan than just a Seiaki or Akiramon fan, if just because Seidou’s admiration for Amon is beautiful and Amon sees Seidou as someone he would have died to save, so as long as they haven’t all confronted each other or that Akira doesn’t clearly state that she has romantic feelings for Amon, I’m still all about Seiakiramon. :)))
I hope it helps Anon! Thanks again for the very nice words and please have a nice weekend! ^3^
but you’re right, at least he smiled while crying and for once it felt more genuine than the few smiles we’ve seen ever since Arima’s death.
midnight-in-town 