Seidou is really crushing my heart in this chapter…
He went against the organization that gave him power
He killed the only person who treated him like a valuable and strong associate
He did it because he thought that this way he could finally be seen as a hero by the people he thought he had forgotten because ‘ghouls can’t care about people’
He did it because he wanted for Houji to admire him, to look at him with pride
He did it because he wanted for Akira to be on his side, he who’s always denied any attachment and any romantic feelings for her, wanted her recognition.
He did it because he wanted to prove himself he was worth that praiseGosh, I am crying too, my son
Why can’t you just love yourself
(I’m dead inside too)
This post is completely on point and to make things even harder for my feels I can’t help but wonder if Seidou started to realize that he wanted Akira to be on his side and for her to “see him being heroic” after the auction arc, when he felt ashamed at the thought that she saw her as a OEG covered in blood.
At least no one can doubt that he planned ahead and waited for a good opportunity to kill Tatara, it was definitely premeditated.
But you know the worst gotta be this…
because if he believes he only ever saw her face from the side, that probably means he thinks she never really looked at him [x], so after she saw him as a terrifying OEG during the auction arc Seidou wanted to really show Akira that he could be a hero in her eyes…
Seidou: I really came to save you all… And yet…
Seidou: I was his subordinate… And him trying to kill me… Unforgivable.
Seidou: If Houji-san was there on that day, this probably would’ve never happened.
Seidou: I… I also wanted you to see it.
And… *sobs* the conclusion to all this is just so very very sad (and Amon’s arrival is just plain painful as well, considering he and Seidou are probably enemies now ;_;)
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midnight-in-town 