OMG! Would make everything hilariously better than it currently is since Tanaka is Sebastian’s senpai and probably the true MVP of this story (considering the amount of things he probably knows about what’s going on), even if it doesn’t work for all the arcs. xDD

• Tanaka and the early days of Kuroshitsuji:
• “Hello, I’m a chibi who constantly drinks tea in the background.”
• “#tea”
• “That’s all.” 
• “Also #donburi, because that demon kouhai of mine totally is a weeaboo.”

• Tanaka and Ciel’s abduction by the Italian Mafia:
• “#tea”
• “#tea #tea #te– oh a pie, perfect to go with my tea!”
• “what do you mean the young master was abducted?”
• “by the way Mey Rin, don’t bother with polishing the cutlery. The demon took them all with him, I’ll have to ask the young master to buy some more once he’s back. Blood stains are really a bitch to get rid off.”

• Tanaka and the Jack the Ripper arc: 
• “And that’s one more relative buried 6 feet under. I might not be a genius at chess, but even I understand that you need to keep as many pawns as possible otherwise the game is over.” 
• “I always bet on the Midford family as the last survivors of this mess anyway.”
• “The good thing though is that, as a Japanese character, it’s easy to put an end to the debate ‘is Grell male or female’ within the household, since I’m familiar with what the term ‘okama’ is all about.“ 

• Tanaka and the Curry arc: 
• “so two Indian men,

  a Chinaman from the triad and an old Japanese warrior turned into an English butler all arrive in the young master’s townhouse in London…. Seriously it sounds like the beginning of a bad joke, it’s probably why I wasn’t really involved in this arc.”

• “I mean, aside from drinking my tea, obviously. In the background.”
• “TFW the Queen and her secretary have cool sunglasses and I only own the equivalent of half a pair of glasses tho’.”

• Tanaka and the Circus arc: 
• “Someone will have to explain to me why I even bothered hiding dead bodies from Lady Elizabeth, when I know for a fact that she’s deadly and that she probably only was pretending not to hear all the commotion in the first place”. 
• “Oh shit, the servants destroyed a large part of the manor I am freaking out…… Just kidding, I know the demon will fix it back in 5 minutes and I have to watch out for my blood pressure anyway. I know I don’t look 80+ but I’m not immortal.”

• Tanaka and the Murders at Manor arc: 
• “Or the day I got my job back after 4 years of silently waiting and drinking tea in the damn background. Finally.” 
• “I know it won’t last because my kouhai is a demon and he’s not really dead though. Don’t worry I’ll soon be back to my Chibi condition.”
• “By the way, if I can see through the young master not being the real Ciel then I can see through his act of feeling devastated by the demon’s death. You ain’t fooling me.… what’s your name again?”
• “All in all, the hardest part was not laughing at the demon’s fake funeral, but if the Undertaker can hold it in, then I have to manage as well.” 

• Tanaka and the Campania arc: 
• “I wasn’t there because the young master wasn’t clever enough to take me along instead of the demon, even though he knew Lady Frances would be here.” 
• “I always knew the Undertaker was bad news though. I mean, he never once washed his hair ever since my first mistress, Lady Claudia, died, so if that’s not foreshadowing that he’d end up insane, I don’t know what is.” 
• “The real question should be where was I during the Easter chapter at the end of this arc, because I was the only one who didn’t participate in the egg hunt.” 
• “I know that it might be because I’m the one who taught Lady Elizabeth all these ninja moves and that they wanted a fair hunt, but still, it hurt my feelings…especially since Bard blew up the kitchen and I had no more tea to drink after that. It’s not because I am old that I can’t feel lonely.”

• Tanaka and the Weston arc: “
• “So you know that pie filled with super strong laxatives that the demon prepared for Red House? I exchanged it with the thing Bard ‘cooked’. Poor kids.”
• “’Blue House won!’ Wow. So not expected.”
• “LMFAO aaaand obviously they fell in the water. That part didn’t happen 20 years ago.”
• “…I feel there is a discrimation problem in Kuroshitsuji though? After he left the school, the young master bought something for every servant but me and I’m coincidentally the only Japanese character around??? Mey Rin even had a new pair of glasses WHEN I HAD TO MANAGE WITH THE SAME MONOCLE FOR AT LEAST THE LAST 15 YEARS!!”

• Tanaka and the Green Witch arc:
• “Oh no… Werewolves. What. Am I really supposed to believe in that shit when I already am acquainted with demons and shinigamis?”
• “I know I should pretend harder to be worried about the young master’s current state, but he already sold his soul to a demon so it can’t get any worse… waIT, DEMON, COME BACK! WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU’RE GOING?”
• “Best part of the arc: not the moment where I’m badass and cutting down bullets even though I only own half a pair of glasses (because that happens in England too) but when I meet with my old friend Heinrich.” 
• “We both got through so much together, having to always prepare tons of sandwiches for Lord Diedrich, because Master Vincent was constantly stressing him out. It’’s no legend, sandwiches make great friendships happen.”

• Tanaka and the Blue Sect arc: 
• “….First appearance in two years of this arc being published and I’m being shit on for being seen as the real Ciel’s ally.“
• “It’s not my fault that I’m not surprised and that I apparently know why he’s back from the dead, even if I can’t tell you why yet!
  …Not sure there has to be a reason.”

• “No, I’m not ‘Lord Polaris’!”

Haha, omg poor Tanaka who has to deal with so much shit!

Thanks for sharing Anon, it was fun! Have a nice day! ^_^